How We Change as Mothers

As my daughter is now one and a half, I glance back at my old blogs and pictures of her and how the day to day life was then. Now that I am embarking on full toddler hood, the emotions and stresses have shifted and changed. We begin with this little creature who completely depends on you for everything, and their life is in your hands. It is a major life change, which is amazing but can be overwhelming and scary. You slowly fall into your own mothering style and recreate your new life. A life that involves being a mom 24-7, and placing hobbies, nights out, and basically freedom on hold. Your so tired and overwhelmed you almost don't notice, and then when you get your time out, you are still missing them and feel almost lost because you don't have to be a mom for a hot minute. Your an onlooker on your infant's life, and then you become a participant once they turn one. Eventually you get into toddler hood and your role changes again as a mother. Now you are teaching them right from wrong, and No will become the main word in your vocabulary. When you venture out to the store, shopping or church, you always have to be prepared. It can be exhausting going in and out of car seats and trying to collect your mind and think while multitasking your toddler.

I find now, as much as I adore being a mother and adore every moment with my daughter, I need me time. In the journey of motherhood I have forgotten how to do things for myself. I forget to take time out to do something fun or to simply escape being a mother momentarily. I felt extremely guilty at first as if I was saying I didn't want to be around my daughter 24-7. Our marriages change, our views change, and we continue to change also. The more I let the change over take me, the more frustrated I become as a woman and a mother. I have come to the conclusion that if I let myself go as a person and a woman, what type of person would I be to my daughter, family or as a wife. I am now rediscovering new hobbies, and finally trying to look at myself in addition to life as a mother.