It is frustrating because every book and every person has a different opinion about parenting. As a new mom I naturally ask others what they have experienced, so I can take in some insight from their experiences. However, it ends up confusing me in finding what is best for my daughter sometimes. I am starting to realize that I have to find my own way as a mom, and I need to handle every situation based on my daughter and how we want to handle things. I am going to be honest, it is frustrating at times. It feels like I am walking blindly through a blizzard trying to find a light. When I compare my baby with my friend's babies, all the babies are different but the situations and milestones are the same. I think it is interesting how everyone chooses their own way to parent, and who is anyone to judge? I have had run in's with people who are very opinionated about what they believe is the way to handle situations which are the total opposite of mine. I think every mom gets to a point where they can finally say, " Thank you for your input, but I think I am going to stick to my own method." I always turn to my mom and my husband's wife for advice on situations I face being a new mother. My sister in law has four children, and I value her opinion and advice because it is always helpful. My mother will tell me her opinions but also tells me to find the best ways that work for me.
The entire experience of motherhood, ever since I found out I was pregnant, has changed my life. It forces you to trust your instincts and live every day for another person. I continue to shock myself every day on what I can handle and how I handle various issues. I am discovering my own self more and more because it is all on me now. I have to make decisions based on my daughter, and stand strong in my decisions. I am changing as a woman and it is amazing.
Molly I am totally with you. MA didn't start sleeping through the night until she was 10 months old and I ran across people that were very opinionated about the fact that by 6 months or earlier she wasn't sleeping through the night. but you now what she was hungry and i felt good comforting her and I felt when she was ready she would sleep through the night. and guess what, once she started it is been smooth sailing every since, except for when she has been sick, but that is expected. so good luck and do what you feel is right. every baby is different and does things when they are ready. heck MA is still getting 2-3 bottles a day, but my dr said that was ok til 18 months :) heck i have friends with 2 yr olds that still get a night time bottle..... take other people for what they are, an opinion, and do what you feel works for irelyn
ReplyDeleteMolly, I understand you are going through something new, and big (a child is a big deal!) ... but Irelyn is not even 6 months old yet!! Chill out a bit LOL It is not all on you, as you have stated in many previous blogs, you have big support system. Also, if you are taking things so hard right now, you're gonna totally freak/frazzle when you get to a year, two years, three years, etc. Wait til you actually encounter something, spread the wealth (of worry/stress and fun) and ENJOY it.
ReplyDeleteWendy...I know she is only 6 months old, I am not freaking out, I am just documenting my experiance and how much it has changed me for the better. Every month I live and learn...and I will be just great as she grows. I always enjoy everything with her! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Elizabeth! I know it does seem every mom is different, which sometimes makes you feel better! lol. I appreciate your input a lot.
ReplyDeleteJust, a lot of the comments (both in your journal here and when we talk) you seem to be putting a lot of pressure on yourself to be 'supermom'. That's not healthy, because it's unrealistic and stressful. No one is supermom, no matter how great they are - or seem. Also, because you said "because it is all on me now" in your blog above. :)
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