As our children grow and change, we are constantly growing and changing with them. However I am coming to the realization that being a mother is a constant push and pull on our emotions and making everything work. I have these moments where the world begins to fall apart and my mind spins out of control and I realize I am in the midst of a juggling act. I realized that all my labels usually come into play always all at one time; mother, wife, daughter, granddaughter, sister and daughter in law. It is a lot to take in some days and keep a positive attitude, especially when your enjoying the precious moments of your child's life. I have also come to discover the obvious-women worry more, and take everything on at once in their heads. Maybe that is why we get premature wrinkles and gray hairs so quickly? Sometimes I sit on my couch and look around and think, hmmm, I need to clean the house, pick up the toys, do the wash, feed the baby, run to the store, look for a job and pinch pennies. Its overwhelming, and I only have one child :) I use to think Mother's Day and Father's Day were Hallmark holidays, but now I think it is really a designated day to remind everyone to look at their mom's and dad's and how much they do and sacrifice.
Sanity is beginning to become a gift and insanity is a normal emotion that mother's feel day to day. My daughter is not yet walking, but I am sure that will bring on its own blessings and challenges. My sister in law sent me a book called Small steps for mother's, it is a catholic based book for mothers. It has daily meditations to remind us to be thankful for the things we always overlook and forget. I find that it reminds me to stop and be thankful for things when my world feels like it is upside down. Life is messy and crazy and yet beautiful and special.
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