Insanity is Part of Life

     I dedicate this blog to all my friends who feel they have to preface their venting with "I really love my kids, and I would never hurt them". You are allowed to vent and let off some steam and fellow mothers have no room to judge.

I am positive every mother has had moments that they want to pull their hair out or run out of the house screaming. I look at my  beautiful three year old daughter and think, "Oh my gosh, I am going to kill you if you do that one more time!" The truth is that your normal for feeling that way and if you didn't I think most of the moms would probably hate you. My friends who are pregnant or thinking about getting pregnant are excited for the pregnancy, holding your first child, finding the attributes they inherited and watching them grow into adults. That is all wonderful, but the truth of the reality is you will feel insane probably half of that time. It is the way of life for a mother. The harsh truths I have realized;

-You and insanity will spend many days and nights together, so you might as well get comfy.
-From womb to your death, you will worry about your children.
-Say goodbye to sleep because you have no idea when you truly will get it back-so get find your favorite caffeine product and accept it.
-Spit up, food, lollipop, snot, poop, pee and throw up will always get on your clothes
-You will in fact sound like your mother at one point or another
-You are outnumbered even with one child, they are a hell of a lot smarter than they may look
-Sometimes if you can't beat them, just join them, it can be fun in a strange way
-Wine is a great remedy for "I want to scream and jump out of my skin" syndrome (its proven)
-You will know the words to Mickey Mouse, Dora the Explorer, Thomas the Tank for awhile, and they will run on repeat when your praying for silence.
-If anyone tries to wake up your sleeping child, they could possibly be harmed
-It is okay to vent to your friends without justifying anything, trust us we get it!
-Right when you think you  have it down, something will change 
-Make sure you have two friends (could be the same one). One to cry, scream, laugh and ask advice to, and one to go out to have adult beverages with to forget your a mom (but don't get too drunk or you may feel like your pregnant again with morning sickness the next day)
-Finally, the terrible two's are a myth, three is worse, so get ready!