I am feeling guilty at the moment because I am not Mrs. Positive the last couple days. The guilt flows in when my daughter isn't getting the best of me, I actually feel like crawling under the covers for a day or so. As my beautiful baby grows, instead of sleep deprivation exhaustion, it is now exhaustion from keeping her entertained and wear her out throughout the day. On top of this I am job hunting which is depressing for three reasons. One, I have to leave my baby girl when I go back to work. Two, I have not found a job yet, and Three I feel like my whole life is being a mom. I love being at home with my baby, so I am not complaining by any means. I guess it is just hard being alone at home all day with my baby. I do have my wonderful parents who live 15 minutes away and are always there for me. I guess I am at a loss for words, I am just dealing with a dose of being down. My husband is supportive of me, but unable to understand fully how I am feeling and what I am going through, which is okay. I just wish winter was over and some warm weather would show up! I want to be outside in the sun with my baby instead of being cooped up in the house.
I am thankful for family and my friends. It is disappointing many of them don't live near by and that I don't get to see all of them often. I am praying for shot of positive energy to pull me out of this lull....
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